Before our little ones are even born, we are already their moms and start getting comfortable in that role. That means reading all the books and articles, eating healthy, and maybe even asking our own mothers or women we know for their advice.

People will tell you how amazing being a mother is. They will tell you how in love you will be when you look into that baby’s eyes for the first time, and the amount of love you will feel each love. Being a mom is pretty much the best thing that ever happens to you—and they are right.

What they don’t tell you is the more harsh reality of what this role sometimes entails. Yes, you may expect lack of sleep, being a human milk farm, and spending days doing nothing but cleaning poop. But there is a whole lot more that comes with the territory.

Going through it myself, I feel like it is my duty to let you ladies know exactly what you can expect. Go ahead and thank me later. Here are the 5 things no one tells you about being a mom.

1. You Will Milk Yourself

You might expect to have leaking breasts when breastfeeding, but no one really warns you about how uncomfortable this really is—and of course when it will happen.

My leaky book syndrome happens when I miss a feeding (gave him a bottle instead). After become painfully engorged, my breasts have leaked everywhere from in the shower to right through my clothes while sleeping at night.

Make sure to always have breasts pads with you at ALL times when out. And you might just have to relieve those puppies when out with friends—even it is means going in to the bathroom stall and self expressing.

2. You Will Never Want To Leave

You have probably heard that things like “every mom needs a break,” “go out and pamper yourself,” blah, blah, blah. Sure this is true, but it’s easier said then done.

Even with a few month old baby (forget about leaving a newborn), walking out that door will tear your heart into shreds. You might think you want some alone time to relax, but once you are sitting in the beauty salon chair or getting that pedicure, you will start to feel that ping of anxiety and can’t wait to rush home to kiss that baby down to his or her own tootsies.

Granted, over time to gets easier, and you WILL enjoy a few moments of solace out in the real world. But then you will send a text asking how the baby is and fake promise yourself you will never leave again. (Trust me, getting away is healthy and you should try to do it!)

3. You Will Experience “Ghost” Crying
Of course you will go running to your baby when they cry—and even when they aren’t making a peep just to make sure everything is okay. But that sound of your crying baby will follow you.

I call it “ghost crying,” the phenomenon when you are completely convinced the baby is crying and when you go to them they are fast asleep. This will happen when you are mid-shampoo in the shower, or off in the kitchen finally cooking a meal.

Word of advice is have your significant other keep an eye out when you are in the shower and enjoy it.

4. You Will Still Experience Pregnancy Brain

Pregnancy brain is still alive and well way after you deliver. I am convinced my memory will never return as sharp as it once was. This is probably due to lack of sleep, but you will pretty much forget what day it is, what you had for breakfast, let alone that important thing or task you have to do.

Write EVERYTHING important down. Because you will forget.

5. You Will Live In Baby Land

You already know you will be obsessed with your baby, but no one can prepare you for the lasting state of living in baby land.

But you will have it no other way.

This means developing that soothing “baby voice” you speak sometimes, to hearing the nursery rhymes in your head 24/7, and just wait until they are old enough to watch baby cartoons.

Although you may feel like you haven’t had real adult interactions in forever, this is time you can never get back. So enjoy every moment and every milestone. Just don’t forget that it’s okay to pop open a bottle of wine every once in a while and Facetime with your bestie when baby goes to bed to talk about something other than the ABC’s!

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